Blog On The Motorway Swan diving off the tongues of crippled giants

Its about 4 feet wide with razor sharp teeth.

Ah the perils of modern life.  Imagine you are a pop star so utterly damaged as to be unable to make your own decisions any further, and your money mad parents thrust you back into the limelight while you are clearly still struggling with serious mental problems. 

You stride around, that ever so vacant look in your eyes evident to everyone but the celebrity obsessed magazines, and the adoring fans desperate to have you back.  You don't have access to your kids, or indeed to anyone other than your minders, there to totally block any access to the real world that you might have.

Not a pleasant life, maybe, but at least you get to pour out banality through your twitter account, all kittens and clouds and cutesy child friendly nothingness.  It makes you smile, your own little idyll of comfortable nothingness.  Then one day you wake up and found that someone has hacked into said twitter account, and left the following message:

"HI Yall! Brit Brit here, just wanted to update you all on the size of my vagina. Its about 4 feet wide with razor sharp teeth."

Brilliant.  Another day ruined.